*DISCLAIMER* “I have cognac in my coffee”
Like many, I’m a single woman BY CHOICE. To want better for myself is NOT a horrible thing. I WILL NOT SETTLE for just anything or anyone. I’m not a materialistic person never have and never will be those are “things” that don’t last forever.
When a woman says she’s not looking for a man; men get weird like we’re saying we won’t EVER need a man in life. To be clear a woman is an emotional being, but the opposite sex often forget we’re also strong. Strong enough to stand alone, pray alone, learn alone, grow alone and BE alone. Some of us women need time to learn ourselves all over again.
MANY of us find comfort looking to God to show us the way. Kicking it with our friends. Head first in our career to draw us closer to our goals that we had somehow forgotten and put on the back burner. Hitting the gym to get it back right or to keep it tight, or party to maintain our social life. Learning something new to practice growth, writing, reading etc. Some of us balance all of the above. Even single she’s still living.
As a woman living single we prepare ourselves spiritually, mentally, emotionally and physically to be a wife to our future husband so that when the two hearts join as ONE she’ll be the first example of how he should love her. OR we’re only growing to continue living single for our own sanity and happiness.
Don’t fret when you meet a woman who has been single for three plus years. Not ALL of them are bitter and giving themselves to men for cheap thrills and babies every three years. Maybe she’s really finding her love and peace within. So that one day she can feel it’s reciprocated with that one special person designed with her in mind, but other than that she’s content with living single. No Queen’s throne should be disturbed to settle for anything less than a King….and there is a such thing as a Queen without a King– still a Queen.
Let’s be honest; not EVERY woman may evolve in this manner. Some women find themselves moving backwards, moving forward too fast in the wrong direction or not moving at all–just stagnant. Many don’t realize their worth and often decrease their value all to settle for what any man who shows interest in them offer. To see this brings tears to my eyes watching so many loving women who seek validation from men who have no consideration of their emotions. When there’s so much more to being a woman besides having a man just to say you have one. A woman who knows her value is content with being “single”, happy and a peace of mind. And don’t get it confused with “single and lonely” that’s a whole different ball game dealing with both men and women who deal with that.
So to my Queens out there…Single is a living too.
Some have been hurt so bad they only want a man that can give them a good laugh, some good sex and a good bye the next day. No strings attached. Back to work she go. Paying her own bills. Going to church and repenting all her sins. She wasn’t born to be perfect Genesis speaks about her imperfections. Nonetheless, she pays her tithes because it’s worth it. Many is going to judge this. It went from sentimental to spiritually ratchet. She is not for you to judge not her momma and not even her pastor…if she have one.
She is her. She is different. She is single. She is living. She is praying. She’s slaying. Some playing, but not her…not a Queen feeling her crown with jewels. But living single are her tools.
Single is a living too. She don’t have to be a bitter bitch or a hoe because she doesn’t want to settle for you.
What you need to understand is she’s a Queen filled with imperfections, but she’s perfecting. Her heart is worth protecting. So until a King cometh who is worth respecting…SINGLE IS A LIVING TOO.